You don’t realize how much you depend on the Internet and TV for entertainment. The loss of Internet meant the most to me. I'm so glad it's back on, though we still don't have cable TV. Admittedly, I do not have many friends and I cannot leave the house very often from pain. The Internet and pen pals are my ways of connecting with the outside world. My most visited sites, other than gmail, are Twitter and Facebook. On Twitter I have “tweeps” from all corners of the world that I tweet back and forth with. I think most people I follow are spoonies, feminists, Pagans, and LGBTQI peoples. On Facebook most of my friends are EDSers, fibromites, and people from C-PTSD groups. I also get to “see” my friends who aren’t spoonies. I was so afraid that the friends I’ve made online would have moved on and forgotten me by the time I get the Internet back. I really missed them, I really missed you all!
We’ve had people staying at our house all summer long. The car has also been broken down all summer, too. First we had Brandon stay two and a half weeks. I would have turned him out after one night but DH is worried about being mean. I don’t think I’m mean. I have had people step on me all my life with shitty shoes; I do not want to be taken advantage of anymore. So Brandon, like I said, stayed two and a half very, very long weeks. The situation wasn’t made better by the fact that I cannot stand Brandon for too many reasons to list. Among those reasons would be taking advantage of DH’s and mine hospitality. While I was never mean to Brandon I didn’t hide the fact that I don’t like him. One reason I don’t like him is because DH heard Brandon say more than once he thinks this 14 year old girl across the street is “fucking hot,” and he’d like to “fuck her.” Brandon is not a teenager, he’s 21 years old. His most recent girlfriend is 16. I consider 16 child molesting and definitely consider a 21 year old man wanting to have sex with a 14 year old not only wrong, but it is child molesting. I wouldn’t be surprised if Brandon actually molested a little girl someday, if you don't count the 16 year old. He even says that stuff when watching TV and a young teen girl comes on. Apparently he doesn’t realize that he is sick and disgusting. If he asks me though, I’ll be happy to tell him he’s a sick child molester in training, if not already molesting young girls.
So after two and a half weeks of hell, in which I told my DH, every night I wanted him out; someone else came along to take advantage of DH’s kindness. Tiffany and Derick and their son Dawlton came one night saying they had no place to go. Let me make this point clear…I only agreed to this because they have a 3 year old boy. Well, they asked to stay one night. The one night turned into them wanting to stay until the 4th, when their TANF check would come in. For those of you who don’t know what TANF is, it is emergency government aid for families. Well DH talked me into letting them stay until the 4th of September, though I really didn’t want to let them. The reason I didn’t care about them going is I found out that Tiffany’s mother takes care of Dawlton all the time. So the child had a place to go after all.
Well the 4th came and went and they swore they never got the check. Considering the day I write this is September 22nd and they never talk about how they “never got the check” anymore. Maybe they realized their lies are so obviously lies that they no longer say them. I don’t know. I just want them out. They swore they’d look for jobs once and a place to live. Yeah…whatever.
They looked for jobs and a place to live for one day; it was Friday, September 3rd. I remember because I was getting excited to have my house back again. Surprisingly they didn’t find a job and place to live on that one day. I know, it’s shocking isn’t it? It “grinds my gears,” as Peter Griffin says, that they never knock, just come right in. I told them a few days ago and so did DH to stop that. Now they do one quick knock and open the door immediately.
I know I’m not a mother, and I know it’s not nice to judge someone, but Tiffany is a bad mother. She lets Dawlton spank her and hit her. Yes, I am serious. He also screams nonstop unless he is asleep. Dawlton is 3 years old. He’s also never been taught manners at all. You can barely understand him talking, he doesn’t know his colors, shapes, or alphabet, he is completely unfamiliar with manners, he thinks it is not only okay to hit, but it’s funny. He keeps stealing our kitty’s toys, too. He almost poked Niki in the eye with her favorite toy. After that I went and hid all of the toys I thought he may hurt my cat with. If he poked my cat’s eye out I totally claim no responsibility for what I do to Tiffany. I can just say that Tiffany would be in bad shape. It hurts to get knocked in the head by a spoonie’s cane. I’m non-violent, but hurt my DH or our kitties and all that flows out the window. As far as I’m concerned my family comes first always. If you hurt someone my family…well watch out…seriously.
I kicked them out a week and a half ago, but DH came in after me and told them they could stay because Tiffany was crying. That was the night when Tiffany and Derick tried to kill each other. They were on the front porch and she punched him then he punched her. Then they were on the ground, him strangling her and she was landing punches in his pace. She’s a big girl, too, with a slightly masculine build. She weighs more that Derick and I wouldn’t be surprised if those punches gave him a headache for awhile. It was drama, drama, drama and my flashbacks increased dramatically after that and so did DH's seizures.
The other day Tiffany and Dawlton spilled what must have been half a gallon of Kool-aid in the fridge and all over the rug. Did she clean it up? Nope, it’s still there. She just said “Oh well, it isn’t like the carpet isn’t ruined anyway.” Then she left it there! It’s all in the fridge and all over a large section on the floor in front of the fridge. Today I guess I have to go and clean out the fridge and scrub the Kool-aid stains before it sets, if it hasn’t already.
DH thinks that we need to handle the situation delicately. I don’t. I just wanna walk into the room and tell them to get out soon. I want them out in the next 24 hours, but we are giving them until Friday. They haven't looked for a place to stay, except for that one day. So am I bothered by throwing them out? No. They have had plenty of time to find a place to live a hunt for a job. If they were actually really looking for jobs and a place to live I wouldn’t be so angry. They are just taking advantage of us. I want them out so bad!
I'll blog a (hopefully shorter) blog after 5:30 and after we get them to leave on Friday to let you all know what is going on. Sorry this one is so long and thanks for reading it.
I agree, get them out. To hell with Friday. I went through that situation many, many times during my first marriage. My ex was just a very kind person and would give people anything... often it was our last dollar. Seriously, we did not have a phone for several years because one "guest" ran up a phone bill of almost $500 (this was 25 years ago). Even though he paid us back a few months later, the phone co. would not turn it back on unless we put a $500 deposit. Might as well have been $10,000 back then. There were many more.... but I hear ya girl. Your DH needs to realize that some people will just use you up. Kindness is lost on them and all it does it hurt you both. I hope they leave quick. Hugs, Patti
ReplyDeleteThanks Patti. I wrote a follow-up blog on what happened when we talked to them.
ReplyDelete