My Journey With:

Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (hEDS) ~ Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS) ~ Focal Impaired Awareness (Complex Partial) Seizures ~ Fibromyalgia ~ Chronic Myofascial Pain (CMP) ~ Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) ~ TMJ Dysfunction ~ Bipolar Disorder Type I Rapid Cycling ~ Migraines ~ Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease (GERD) ~ Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) ~ Keratosis Pilaris (KP) ~ Complex-Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) ~ Panic Disorder ~ Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) ~ Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) ~ Nonsuicidal Self-Injury (Self-Harm) ~ Piezogenic Pedal Papules ~ Hashimoto's Thyroiditis ~ Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) ~ Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) ~ Specific Phobias ~ Chronic Headaches

Thursday, January 6, 2011

Enjoying the beginning of 2011

Today is only the 6th day of the New Year and my mind is still geared toward change.  I think about what changed to make me the person I am today and get me into the situations I am in today and I think about how I will change in the future.  Change also brings great fear and great excitement.  Change can cause positive and/or negative stressors, change is something that we know will always happen and always has happened.  Life will go one.  Change will continue always.  I'm lucky enough to be on this ride, trying to direct changes the way I want them to happen, but it rarely seems to happen that way.

The other night it was so quiet and perfect.  DH and I were in good moods.  The window was open and the kitties were both in the bedroom with us.  You couldn't hear any of our four houseguests.  We were both reading.  I was reading a cozy murder mystery and DH was reading a Xanth book.  It felt like when we first got together.  Even though we cuddle together reading all the time, the other night it felt extra special, like it did those first days of our relationship when everything was new.  I woke up the next morning still in the same mood, a peaceful, lazy, romantic, mood.  I very rarely wake in the same mood that I went to sleep in, the that night I did.  I snuggled deep into the covers, against the love of my life snoring away next to me.  I couldn't stop an ear to ear smile.  The window was still open from the night before.  It was chilly, but I was okay under the covers.  Niki walked over and curled up next to me.  Sterling curled up next to DH's feet.  It just felt so perfect.  I feel like we were given this moment, or at least I was, to continue to have the strength to go on through the pain and the stress.  Even now, as I write this, I have a goofy smile on my face and a song in my head.

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