So much, so much pain

I feel like a broken record lately saying..."OMG, I hurt so bad...This pain is horrible...I can't take it anymore...I'm gonna lose my mind if this keeps up...OMG there has to be something I can do...I hurt so bad...OMG it hurts!"  I say at least half of this through tears.  Even if I don't say it out loud, it plays over and over in my head.  The thought of coming off my meds eventually, when we are ready to start trying for a baby, terrifies me.  I'm trying this Turmeric Curcumin Gold made by Nutrigold, right now.  I don't know if I've seen any difference yet, it might be too soon to tell.  I got it for free for a site I review items for.  I've tried three other versions of Turmeric Curcumin.  I think one was Spring Valley 500 mg Turmeric, and the other two were Jarrow name brand.  When I took the Spring Valley 500 mg Turmeric, I was also taking Doctor's Best 1500 mg MSM.  With first Jarrow one I tried, Jarrow Formulas 500 mg Curcumin 95,  noticed a difference, but was taking Jarrow 1000 mg MSM at the same time.  With the second combination I tried, I noticed no difference in my pain levels.  The third Jarrow kind I tried , Jarrow 500 mg Curcumin Phytosome, I noticed no difference, and I didn't take MSM with it. It was a little different kind than the first Jarrow one I tried.

I'm trying to keep my life full of things that don't revolve around EDS, fibro, PCOS, or any other illness.  I've been reading more lately, and I've been watching a lot of movies.  I've also been learning about herbs; I'd like to someday become proficient with many healing herbs.  Healing others is something I'd really like to do.  I want to work more on my Italian.  I am going to draw up plans for a fantasy garden sometime in the next few days.  I've been concentrating a lot on my spirituality.  I started writing some of the many pen pal letters I owe.  I've been spending extra time with the kitties.  Lately my hands have been hurting, but when they aren't, I like to crochet and cross-stitch.  I'm getting really tired now and still need to do our taxes.  Enjoy this picture I took today of Niki.