Caught between a rock and a hard place

I guess I should reword that blog title to "caught between slight pain relief and increased seizures."  As you can tell, that line isn't as catchy as the title I decided to go with.  I am on a non-narcotic prescription pain reliever than does very little for pain relief, but it does do some.  Unfortunately people with epilepsy are absolutely not supposed to have this medication.  Not good.  When I was on Lyrica, which is also an anti-convulsant, my seizures dropped down to one every month or two.
Now that I am off of Lyrica my seizures are returning.  I've had three seizures in two weeks.  Last night was the first time I dislocated anything in a seizure.  I dislocated my toe, even though I was wearing tennis shoes.  I didn't have DH put it back until one o'clock in the morning when I woke him to put it back in.  I fell asleep after my seizure and then when I got up DH had a seizure, or two, or three.  So I'd actually forgotten my toe was dislocated until it started hurting really bad.  Before then my pain levels were so high from post-seizure pain that I couldn't pick out that it was my dislocated toe hurting, I just felt all of me hurting.

I woke up this morning in the best of moods, but I was also in a lot of pain in my hips.  I took a nap because DH and I got up so early and I was up really late reading.  I was reading Maiden, Mother, Crone last night and a Kay Scarpetta novel by...um...my mind just went blank.  When I woke up from my nap my home health aide was here and had actually been here for about two hours.  I was surprised.  DH had just let me sleep.

So, to finish the story I started on, the only medication my doctor will give me is this medicine I'm on now.  She won't give me anything stronger or anything made different so that it won't cause my seizures to increase. So, of course, I'm pretty frustrated right now.

I also wanted to mention today is my Grandpa Virgil Hugh Gipson's birthday, March 1, 1936 - May 16th, 2008.  I still can't believe you're gone, Grandpa.