My Journey With:

Hypermobile Ehlers-Danlos syndrome (hEDS) ~ Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome (POTS) ~ Focal Impaired Awareness (Complex Partial) Seizures ~ Fibromyalgia ~ Chronic Myofascial Pain (CMP) ~ Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome (PCOS) ~ TMJ Dysfunction ~ Bipolar Disorder Type I Rapid Cycling With Psychotic Features ~ Migraines ~ Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease (GERD) ~ Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD) ~ Keratosis Pilaris (KP) ~ Complex-Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD) ~ Panic Disorder ~ Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) ~ Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD) ~ Self-Harm ~ Bilateral Piezogenic Pedal Papules ~ Hashimoto's Thyroiditis ~ Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS) ~ Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) ~ Specific Phobias ~ Chronic Daily Headache ~ Eczema

Monday, October 31, 2016

Happy Halloween! Let's Do The Monster Mash!

Happy Halloween everyone! In the spirit of the holiday let's do the Monster Mash!

Saturday, October 8, 2016

The effects of mental illness and our "justice" system

Contains minor spoilers for Orange Is The New Black Season 4.

First of all, This is incredibly hard to write. I'm nearing the end of Season 4 of Orange Is The New Black. This season has really got to me, as it has portrayed two very mentally ill women who are in prison because they didn't have proper psychiatric care and didn't understand what they were doing because of breaks with reality. It's scary knowing that if politicians got a wild hair up their ass and I lost my Medicaid and Medicare I would also be without any medications or any psychiatric care, or if I lost my disability, because then they'd take away my medical care as well. I could easily end up living on the street or worse. When I see these women, when I see Suzanne catatonic, well I've been there. I know what it feels like to be catatonic and trapped inside your head, barely aware of what's going on, and not even knowing your own name. I was like that for three days when a friend's niece died from shaken baby syndrome caused by her babysitter. 

When I see Lolly going through delusions and thinking that people are after her, it terrifies me, because I've been there. I know how scary it is. I live with the certainty that if I lost my healthcare I would end up either dead by suicide, homeless, or in the correctional system. I've never been violent in my life, but I've been the victim of violence so, so many times. I've never had any legal trouble, but I did once think the cops were after me during a psychotic break because there were demons that came out of the TV showing Stigmata and got into me. I remember screaming night after night, as I hallucinated the headless horseman on a huge black stead, rolling a severed head toward me. That time blurs together, it was a bad time in my life. Unfortunately I've had a lot of "bad times." 

Police brutality has often been directed at the mentally ill. Here, here, here, here, here, here, here, here, and here are examples of police brutality against mentally ill people. Mentally ill people are sixteen times more likely to be killed by police, and about one in ten people arrested have mental illness. One quarter of victims of police shootings are mentally ill.

What's scariest, is watching Suzanne and Lolly breakdown, and knowing with the signature of a politician's hand, that could be me, and it terrifies me.

Friday, October 7, 2016

UPDATED: Mental Health Awareness Week: Resources

You're never alone, even when you feel you are. Don't be afraid to reach out and get help. There are people out there to help you. When you're at the bottom, remember, the only way to go is up! 

Call 800-656-HOPE (4673) or live chat with RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network) if you need to talk. Visit for a live chat. RAINN is available 24/7, 365 days a year.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233 or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY) or chat at Their help is available 24/7, 365 days a year.

If you feel like suicide, please know that you are important. Call 1-800-273-8255 or chat or They are open 24/7, 365 days a year.

If you are a LGBTQ+ youth, you can call the Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386. You can also text TREVOR to 1-202-304-1200. If you feel more comfortable chatting online, you can go to They are available 24/7, 365 days a year.

In the USA, you can call the Trans Lifeline, created for transgender people in crisis, at 1-877-565-8860. If you live in Canada you can call 1-877-330-6366. They’re available 9 am-3 am CST . Volunteers may be available during off hours.

If you are a LGBTQ+ elder, you can call Sage LGBT Elder Hotline at 1-888-234-SAGE (1-888-234-7243) Monday thru Friday from 3p m to 11 pm CST, and Saturday from 8 am to 1 pm CST.

If you are a LGBTQ+ youth, you can call the LGBT National Youth Talkline at 1-800-246-PRIDE (1-800-246-7743) Monday thru Friday from 3 pm to 11 pm CST, and Saturday from 8 am to 1 pm CST.

LGBTQ+ people can call the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual And Transgender National Hotline at 1-888-843-4564 from Monday through Friday 3 pm to 11 pm CST and Saturday 11 am to 4 pm CST.

LGBTQ+ people can go to the LGBT National Online Peer-Support Chat for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and questioning people at

The Crisis Text Line exists so you can talk by text to trained counselors about what's on your mind. TEXT “GO” TO 741 741 Free, 24/7, Confidential. You don't need to be suicidal to use this service.

You can find international suicide hotlines below or at

Argentina: + 54 (0) 223 493 0430
Armenia: (2) 538194
Australia: 13 11 14
Austria: 08 93 81 5555
Barbados: (246) 4299999
Belgium: +32 (0) 2 648 40 14
Botswana: 3911270
Brazil: (91) 3223-0074
Canada 1-800-784-2433
China: (21) 63798990
Croatia: (01) 4833-888
Cyprus: 0809 1122
Denmark: +45 70 201 201
Egypt: 762 1602/3
Estonia: 126, 127
Fiji: (0679) 670565
F‌inland: 09-731391
France: 01 46 21 46 46
Germany: 0800 1110 111 (or 222)
Ghana: 2332 444 71279
Gibraltar: 55666
Hong Kong: +852 28 960 000
Hungary: (62) 420 111
India: +91 (0) 44 2464 0050
Israel: 1201
Italy: 8000 86 00 22
Japan: +81 (0) 3 5286 9090
Liberia: 6534308
Lithuania: 8-800 2 8888
Malaysia: (06) 284 2500
Malta: 179
Mauritius: 800 93 93
Netherlands: 0602 222 88
New Zealand: (06) 358 2442
Northern Ireland: 0808 808 8000
Norway: +47 815 33 300
Philippines: (02) 8969191
Poland: 52 70 000
Portugal: (+351) 225 50 60 70
Republic of Ireland: 116 123
Russian Federation: 007 (8202) 577-577
Samoa: (+381) 21-6623-393
Serbia: (044) 08080
Singapore: 1800- 221 4444
South Africa: 0861 322 322
South Korea: (2) 715 8600
Spain: 902 500 002
Sri Lanka: 011 057 2222662
St. Vincent: (784) 456 1044
Sudan: (249) 11-555-253
Sweden: 020 22 00 60
Switzerland: 143
Thailand: (02) 713-6793
Tobago: (868) 645 2800
Tonga: 23000
Trinidad and Tobago: (868) 645 2800
Turkey: 182
Ukraine: 058
United Kingdom: 116 123
Zimbawe: (9) 650 00


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